To Sacrifice But Knowing to Survive

I made a huge decision a few minutes ago...I have decided that I am going back to school to get my Master's degree.

And I'm scared....quite shitless

I have been out of school for almost 5 years now. I've always wanted to get my Master's but I have kept putting it off for years now. The best time would have been right after I got my Bachelor's since I was still in school mode but instead I needed a break. It was initially supposed to be a short break, like a year or so, but it has turned into a 5 year break.

I dont know how to get into the flow of school again. My last year in college, I worked 32 hours a week at a hotel and I was a Resident Assistant at school. The stress of work and school contributed to my mental downfall. I am scared that I might be overexerting myself again since I work so many hours at IBM. I dont even know how I will find time to take classes or much less study.

I could keep putting it off but when I make up my mind about something, there is no turning back for me. Something clicked this morning and this is an official decision. I am going to apply for Fordham Grad School since I got my Bachelor of Science there, but I think I'll aim a bit higher and perhaps try NYU or Columbia Grad schools. I mean, if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna go all out and aim for the best. I also have to think about the financial aspect of this decision, so I might have to choose cheaper schools but I'll figure the details out as I go.

I'm terrified that this wont work out or that I'll fail, but I never want to look back and regret not doing this. If my mind is made up, I cannot and will not let fear stand in my way. I've always known sacrifices result in rewards and I have always survived all my sacrifices.

This one will not be any different

Title post is "Walk" by the Foo Fighters